2013

2013

This year has been filled with so much life.

I've been blessed exponentially with joy and health.

My husband told me the other night that this has been "our best year yet". 

Our sons are beautiful and healthy and brilliant.

I have cherished time with family and friends.

I have learned more both in school and in life (mostly life) than I ever could have imagined. 

My surrogacy adventure has opened my eyes and my heart in ways that words cannot describe.

Life in this house has never been filled with more laughter.

It's been a fantastic year.

I can't wait to see what 2014 holds.

Happy New Year,

Carmen

being merry.

what a joyous holiday we've had. 

hope you have too.

Merry Christmas,

Carmen

final appointment.

I had my six-week postpartum check up today. All went well. When I went to leave I asked my doctor when to come back and she said, "Not for a year!". And then we both stood there for a second almost in disbelief. I've been hanging out at the doctor's office at least a couple times a month for the past 16 months or so and it was so odd to think that I didn't have to come back until next December.

We shared a great big hug and I thanked her for taking such great care of me, and she thanked me for letting her be a part of something so much bigger than she'd seen before.  

It was quite something today to walk out of the office with no two-week follow up appointment. 

I truly found a fantastic physician when embarking on this adventure. I knew I needed to find someone who was completely supportive of the surrogacy, but more importantly, completely supportive of  me and my well-being. And I did just that. I found a doctor who went out of her way to work with a clinic across the country in preparation for the IVF. She not only took care of me and Bunny, but she took care of Jack and Jill too. She had like four patients in one, and she was a complete rockstar the whole way. 

She eased my anxieties (and Jill's too!) about anything pregnancy/baby/labor/delivery/hemorrhage related. She talked to me like a person, not a patient. She's funny, and personable, and just the right amount of sarcastic - when the time called for that. She's also brilliant, and professional, and just the right amount of firm - when the time called for that. She was everything I had hoped for in an OB and even more. 

I am lucky to have had such a fantastic medical experience along with my fantastic surrogacy experience. I mean to have amazing intended parents AND an amazing doctor? Please!

It felt a lot like closing the chapter today - my final appointment. I walked out with a tear and a smile. What a wonderful adventure this has been.

Until next time,

Carmen

life lately.

life lately.

Finals have come and gone. Thank goodness. Feeling super ready for break.

I'd say that the semester was successful, but I'm ready for the next one (after the break of course!).

The boys are ready for break too.

Christian is at the most funnest age ever. Yep. Funnest.

I've just started working out again. Oy. I have zero muscle tone and zero endurance.

Despite of those things it feels good to get back to the gym.

Nolan threw up all over the (carpeted) floor today. Poor thing. And poor carpet.

Baby Bunny, Jack, and Jill are doing well.

Christmas crafts? Yes. Photos to prove my craftiness will be provided soon.

If I hear another person complain about their upcoming birthday/getting older/gray hair I might have to physically place my foot into my mouth.

I'm cooking up my goals for this upcoming year and I can't wait to share them with you! It's going to be a fun year on the blog.

I'm hosting my holiday meal on the 23rd this year. I can't for the life of me decide what to make. I'm running out of time guys.

I may or may not be really great at procrastinating. This is sometimes a good attribute. Other times.. not great.

Until next time,

Carmen

i'll carry that.

This post comes at a perfect time. Just after my proclamation of adoration to my college career, it's important to acknowledge the other side. I love college, but it's not always bright and shiny. 

I think these feelings are applicable to lots of women these days. More women are pursuing careers outside of the home than ever. Whether out of need or desire, it doesn't matter, both are valid and honorable. That being said, it's not easy to carry the full time job of mom/wife/chef/housekeeper and carry anything else at the same time. 

It's heavy to carry multiple things at once. 

Dinner? I'll carry that.

Bedtime stories? I'll carry that. 

1200 word paper on the aspect of government I find most interesting (....seriously.)? I'll carry that. 

Meeting with a student of mine who is failing and realizes it's almost the end of the semester? I'll carry that.

9 am Kindergarten Christmas concert? I'll carry that. 

It's a juggling act, and women today are professionals jugglers. But something I'm finding is that I'm carrying more than just these tasks.

The disappointment in Christian's eyes when I have to study instead of play? I'll carry that.

The remarks on my paper that it's well thought out, but rushed? I'll carry that. 

The frustration in Yosi's voice as I call to say I'll be home late and miss dinner (again.)? I'll carry that. 

My own sinking heart as I drop Nolan off an extra day at daycare so I can catch up on school work? I'll carry that. 

Knowing that I submitted work that was less than my best because I spent the evening painting Christmas ornaments instead of working on homework all night like I my homework demanded? I'll carry that. 

There are times where it feels impossible to continue on with the current load I'm juggling. 

As long as I feel it's important to continue my career outside of the home, I'm going to juggle. And for as long as this is my reality, there are times when I just can't be everywhere all the time. And when this happens, there is disappointment from one direction or another, and always the disappointment that I have with myself for not actually having super powers. I'll carry that, too. 

Until next time,
Carmen